Junjou Animals
by VladTheImpaler413
Summary: A three shot series where the couple compare thier lovers to animals.
1. Usagi the Fox, Misaki the Deer

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Hello! I was thinking about how some animals can relate to humans and thought that this would be funny to do.

**First up is Akihiko and Misaki!**

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Misaki was lying in bed with Usagi again. How he ended up sleeping with him, he would never know.

It started off as an arguement about how Akihiko never left Misaki alone to get things done. He had interrupted the younger male doing homework again and Misaki feared that he would fail. He confronted the other about this situation. Then it turned into kissing and then hugging. And then into something more.

Misaki sighed and got up, careful enough not to wake up the other, and went to make breakfast. He switched on the t.v to check the weather and a commercial came on. It was about a new movie coming out. The movie was about kids turning into animals. Misaki watched interestedly and started thinking.

_'What would Usagi san be if he were an animal?'_

Misaki thought about his situation last night and realized something. Akihiko would always manage to take what he wanted and do things in his favor. If he got Misaki upset, he got sex. If he made the other feel bad, he would get something in return. He blackmailed Aikawa if she was becoming to much of a bother. He somehow convinced Misaki to stay with him. He got Misaki to cook and clean for him in return for staying.

In short, he always seemed to get out of tight situations and have things turn out in his favor.

Suddeny the answer hit Misaki with such a force that he sat down and turned the t.v off.

"Usagi san should be called Kistune san!"

Yes. Akhiko was definantly a fox all right. And a really good one at that.

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Akihiko heard Misaki go down stairs but he remained in bed. He waited until Misaki told him breakfast was done before he got out of bed.

The two ate in silence and Akihiko noticed that Misaki was glaring at him the entire time. He figured that it had to do with last night.

"What's wrong?"

Misaki looked away and blushed slightly. "N-nothing."

The author grinned and went over to Misaki's side of the table. The younger snapped out of his musings when he felt a hand making it's way up his shirt.

"Tell me and I'll continue." He said, licking Misaki's ear lobe.

"This is exactly what I thought!"

Akihiko stopped confused at the sudden outburst. "What?"

Misaki quickly explained his thoughts of Akihiko being more akin to a fox than a rabbit. The older male listened and chuckled.

"Indeed. I am a fox. And Misaki is my prey." He grabbed hold of Misaki before the younger could slip away.

"A-ah! I-I have to go to school Usagi san!"

Akihiko looked at the clock and confirmed that Misaki was right and when he let go of him, the small boy bolted for the door and took off. This made Akihiko think of Misaki as an animal.

_'Hmmm. If I'm a fox, then Misaki must definantly be a deer. He's shy, and sweet, and innocent. But he's not afraid to confront you when the time calls for it. He's also pretty fast when he's cornered and getting hunted down so to speak.'_

That day both couples found out what they were most like and each found it funny.

Who ever herad of a fox and a deer living in piece together?

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**How was it?**


	2. Puppy Nowaki and Hiroki the Cat

**Been a while huh? Next up is Egoist!**

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Hiroki could sometimes swear that Nowaki was a puppy. Not a dog, but a puppy!

"Hiro san, can we go on a picnic? Let's view the cherry blossoms together!"

Nowaki was practically jumping up and down. It vaguely reminded Hiroki of a dog that was promised to go for a walk.

With a sigh, the older male agreed. He simply nodded his head and returned to the book he was reading. He wasn't really into it anymore, he was just staring at the book. In his mind he was compairing his Nowaki with a puppy. Then he got a better idea. He grabbed a pen and a blank piece of paper to write on.

_1) Both are overly energetic. (Don't they have an on/off switch?)_

_2) Nowaki greets me at the door. A dog also greets its master at the door. (Damn right I'm the master!)_

_3) Both are very territorial. (Just thankful that Nowaki is a man and doesn't pee on everything!)_

_4) Both are overly friendly. (Or stalkers. Either/or.)_

"What're you doing Hiro san?"

"Whhaaa!" Hiroki threw the book and paper up in the air. Nowaki had just appeared out of thin air, scaring the older male.

"Nowaki! Don't sneak up on people like that! You could have given me a heart-" He cut short when he realized that the other wasn't paying attention. Instead Nowaki had seized the piece of paper and was reading it. Hiroki felt his whole body grow cold when he saw Nowaki pick up the fallen pen and scribble something down. He handed the paper back to the professor.

The brunette looked down and realized that Nowaki had written something under it.

_5) Both of us are always loyal to the ones we love._

Nowaki smiled as Hiroki began to spew forth threats and curses. He was only silenced when Nowaki placed his lips on the older males.

Little did Hiroki know was that Nowaki had done a comparison too.

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Nowaki smirked a little when Hiroki was complaining about the weather being to cold despite the april season. Hiroki was such a finicky person. It reminded Nowaki of a cat sometimes.

_'Hiro san's a kitty cat!'_

"What are you smirking about?"

Nowaki shrugged his shoulders nonchantly. "I don't know."

Hiroki left the house for his job, grumbling all the while. Throughout the whole day, Nowaki thought about the similarities between the two.

_'Let's see. Both like to sleep in. They're both extremely quick to anger. Both are extremely cute.'_

The list extended all the way to how both Hiroki and cats were finicky on what they ate and how they had to have a constant pattern. They both hated being to hot or to cold, and niether of them liked being touched constantly. Even thier aloof manners were similar.

When Hiroki got home that night, Nowaki could sense that the other was in a very pissed off mood. If the door slamming open was anything to go by.

"Idiots! They're all idiots!" Ah! His job. He obviously had more work to do. Nowaki continued preparing dinner. Smiling all the while.

"What're you smiling for you idiot!"

"Oh, I'm just glad Hiro san is home!" Nowaki practically beamed.

They ate thier dinner while Hiroki complained at how his work was treating him, how Miyagi teased him today, and mostly how his students failed his test. "I mean they're all idiots if they can't answer some of thier questions. I even made the test easier than normal!"

"I see Hiro san." Nowaki replied. In his mind he could imagine Hiroki with cat ears hissing at his students.

"Hey. Nowaki."

"Hmm?"

Hiroki folded his arms, looking away. "I'm kind of cold."

Nowaki smiled. "I'll make you warm Hiro san." _'Hiro san's way of saying pet me.'_

Nowaki later told his lover what he thought about. He explained his comparison and was rewarded with a pillow in his face and insults that followed.


End file.
